Microsoft patches Windows and Excel – breaks audio, remote access, and paste
Microsoft's Latest Patches for Windows and Excel: A Masterclass in Breaking Things
Redmond's quality drive detour through the "known issues" list continues. In a move that surprises absolutely no one, the latest security updates from Microsoft have managed to silence audio, kill remote access, and disable the basic ability to paste in Excel.
🛠️ The "Quality" Breakdown
Microsoft has officially admitted that its September security rollout is causing significant disruptions. While the company insists it is prioritizing stability, the reality on the ground suggests otherwise.
1. Remote Desktop Services (RDS) Chaos
Reports surfaced on social media almost immediately, and Microsoft has since confirmed that RDS is malfunctioning across several platforms, including Windows 11 26H1 and Windows Server 2012.
"Related tools, including Microsoft Management Console (MMC), RDS Licensing Diagnoser, and File Explorer might also become unresponsive," Microsoft admitted.
The Server 2012 Irony: Windows Server 2012 is scheduled to exit the Extended Security Updates (ESU) program on October 13, 2026. One could argue this breakage is simply a "parting gift" to encourage administrators to finally migrate.
Observed Symptoms:
- Connections dropping after a few minutes.
- Servers freezing at the message:
"Please wait for the Remote Desktop Configuration". - The Windows Update page hanging indefinitely with a loading icon.
Temporary Fix: If a VM is locked out via RDP, try stopping (deallocating) and then restarting the instance.
2. The Silence of the USBs
Audio support has taken a hit for those using USB Audio Class 1.0 devices. Despite the standard being decades old, users on Windows 11 26H1, 25H2, and 24H2 are experiencing:
- Total loss of audio.
- Broken volume sliders and sound settings.
- Multichannel audio failures.
Current Workaround: Some users have found success by switching their devices to two-channel mode. Microsoft is working on a permanent fix, though they've provided no ETA.
3. Excel's "Silent" Failure
In an attempt to patch remote code execution and information disclosure vulnerabilities, Microsoft accidentally broke the Paste function.
The behavior is particularly insidious:
- The operation fails silently.
- The source remains highlighted.
- The destination remains unchanged.
- No error message or system beep is triggered.
Since many users have automatic updates enabled, this bug may already be live on your machine.
| Issue | Affected Software | Primary Symptom | Known Workaround |
|---|---|---|---|
| RDS | Win 11 / Server 2012 | Connection hangs/drops | Deallocate & Restart VM |
| Audio | Win 11 (various) | No sound/broken controls | Switch to 2-channel mode |
| Excel | Office Suite | Paste fails silently | Reinstall Office / Uninstall Update |
📉 The Logic of the Update Cycle
The probability of a Microsoft update being entirely bug-free can be expressed as:
To resolve the Excel issue, some users are resorting to manual command-line removals of the security update:
# Hypothetical command to remove a problematic update
wusa /uninstall /kb:XXXXXXX /quiet /norestart
📰 Industry Pulse: Other Headlines
While Microsoft struggles with its updates, the rest of the tech world is equally chaotic:
💻 Software & AI
- Rust: Now designated as a 'Tier 1' internal language at Microsoft.
- Azure SQL: Data Sync will stop accepting new users before 2027.
- Copilot: An "AI uprising" was delayed after the service crashed.
- Salesforce/ERP: Microsoft is launching an AI-powered converter to poach users.
- Anthropic: Claude's "Felony Bench" reveals a rap sheet as long as OpenAI's.
- AI Code: One Microsoft team admits they are drowning in AI-generated code.
🛡️ Security & Cyber-Crime
- Blue Moon: A new AI-driven exploit kit is targeting Chrome and Windows.
- RubyGems: OpenAI's malicious bot swarm launched an attack.
- DDR5 Trick: New hardware can turn RAM into encrypted memory to expose data (requires physical access).
- Signal: Russians are impersonating support to launch phishing campaigns.
- SharePoint: On-prem versions are under zero-day attack after patches failed.
- Conti: A Ukrainian lawyer got 4 years for his side-hustle as a coder.
🏢 Corporate & Hardware
- Oracle: Celebrating a massive quarter with... more layoffs.
- HPE: The B10000 R6 hits General Availability, claiming "unified storage."
- Nvidia/Groq: The DOJ is looking into the $20B "acquihire," though it may be too late.
- d-Matrix: Joining the NVLink "true believers" with new rack designs.
- Apple: The Apple Watch can allegedly record snippets of conversations without consent.
🌍 Legal & Policy
- Right-to-Repair: EU rules are being ignored by smartphone makers; enforcement is lacking.
- VMware: Defending the end of SDK downloads that help with backups/migrations.
- Datacenters: Developers are eyeing your backyard; FAS suggests negotiating harder for tax breaks.
- Virgin Media: Moving email services to a third-party provider.
🖼️ Visual Evidence
Final Note: For those still using a spare room to house a Soviet-era supercomputer, you are likely safer than those updating to Windows 11 26H1 today.